Triviality

I spend hours becoming stressed about things that should be trivial. What to have for dinner, whether or not to go out, when to have a shower.
Sometimes just looking at myself can make me stressed because I feel like I have a thousand things I have to do and fix and improve. I think way too much about food, photos, clothes and text messaging. It sounds completely shallow, and even self-obsessed.
Even thinking about it a little while trying to write has me all pent up and stressed and nervous. Like my chest is constricted and there's a weight on my shoulders. In my house there are frequently arguments over trivial things, such as TV or the last potato waffle or whether or not someone is allowed to use something belonging to someone else. The problem is that even the most trivial of things have a connection to more deeply rooted needs, feelings, thoughts, they can spark and idea or emotion that is all consuming. I hate the way you appear like some sort of bratty petulant child in reaction to something that should mean nothing, and really does mean nothing, but just set off a tornado of bad thoughts which cause you to turn everything into a nightmare.
I was just bothered by something trivial, I was at a party recently and took a lot of photos. I was in a few with a friend I used to be very close to and I notice that on facebook he has hidden any of just the two of us from his profile. Now if I think rationally and logically he may not have liked them, or thought there were too many similar ones, or not wanted to look like we were together because it was just the pair of us. But ma brain catastrophises, spiralling into a dozen negative reasons and becoming sad and angry and anxious and generally upset about all the things I think it could be!
A few deep breaths later and I'm calm but it will niggle at the back of my mind til the end of the day. It irks me even more that this has upset me than the actual reasons behind the upset. Maybe it smacks too much of change, or failure, or rejection to my mind when it's actually not that complex.
I wish I could switch off these parts of my brain that do this. Instead I analyse them. And I write.