I recently revealed this top-secret blog to my friend Clyde and after doing so told him that now I could never write about him-even-anonymously-in case he should read it. He pointed out to me something that I had not myself noticed-that this was censorship and if I can't write whatever I want on my own damned blog then where can I? Besides it's not like any of my friends can prove I'm writing about them-perhaps I should include a disclaimer like on fiction novels any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.
We do live in a society where we spend more time dancing around what we really think than just being honest. While I pride myself on honesty there are definitely situations where I 'censor' myself and say what I know is the right thing or the more preferable thing (often this is in academic essays because you don't get great grades for essays entitled 'why I think my lecturer is talking out of his ass'). Clyde does not seem to be one of these people it's genuine thoughts or silence from him in my experiences thus far. While I believe that, like everyone, he has things that he will dance around I've realised that he may be one of the most genuine people I've got to know since starting college (a bit of a bummer so close to summer).
This recent realisation has made me wonder just how many of us really say what we think and how many just keep it in because it's not worth the effort to try and explain shit to people who won't get it-besides sometimes inane chatted is surprisingly soothing at times-like bad television or putting on the radio. Anyone who reads this blog knows that sometimes I can't kick start my tired brain enough to really engage with anything original or intelligent. Yet other days I wanna be deep as fuck but I have to bring it here after a day of inane small talk. Admittedly I love a bitta gossip and I like to be there for people too when they genuinely have something they need to share...I'm a talker (except when tired..or on the phone with the exception of my sister) and sometimes that means I'll babble on any topic from someones 'rad vintage shirt' to the issues of gay sex. Guess this blog isn't so different to my normal life-I mostly just babble about anything that comes up!